I have, perhaps, a startling confession to make.
I don't believe in God.
I believe in gods - small g - but not God. I do not believe there is an omnipresent, omniscient, all-powerful God. My gods are flawed. They do not know everything. They can't do everything. They're not always paying attention. One of my favorite quotes describes WHY I think of my gods like this.
"Is God willing to prevent evil, but not able? Then he is not omnipotent. Is he able, but not willing? Then he is malevolent. Is he both able and willing? Then whence cometh evil? Is he neither able nor willing? Then why call him God?"
(this has been attributed to Epicurus, but there's a lot of debate over whether that's correct.)
In the wake of the last two shootings - the one in the Oregon mall, my home state! and the one in Connecticut that killed all the children - this seems like a time for this quote. A benevolent, omnipotent, omniscient God COULD NOT have allowed that to happen. I refuse to believe in a God that would.
There's also the conundrum of, if God created us, then he created evil as well and allowed it. I will not believe in such a God.
My gods are small. I view my gods as facets of the same divine force; I see no issue with praying to Brigid with one breath and Kali with the next. I believe in Pantheism - EVERYTHING is part of the divine force. In a sense, praying to Brigid is praying to myself; focusing my energy, my will, through the lens that is Brigid in order to achieve an end. When I say I hear Cerridwen calling, it not that an entity named Cerridwen is trying to get my attention; it is that I feel myself needing to transform away from the hearth and homemaker I've been and into something new.
I do believe there is a divine force. I do believe in magic. This sets me apart from atheism. But the God of monotheism just angers me.
This rambling brought to you by Facebook drama with family. (I'm in green, my mother is in black.)